The Hogwarts of TV
by ttsuperwholock
Summary: What happens when the characters from Harry Potter, the Avengers, the Lord of the Rings, Pokemon, the Hobbit, Sherlock (which, regrettably, I know very little about), Star Wars, and some actors all go to Hogwarts? Craziness happens, that's what. I didn't note it, but the Weasley twins are in this.
1. 0: The Character List & Intro

**So, yeah, this is just a silly little thing I wrote where it's basically Hogwarts for movie/TV characters like the Avengers, the Lord of the Rings, Sherlock (which I don't know much about), and a variety of other stuff. The houses are the same, and the first chapter will be the sorting (this chapter is all the characters in here). This author's note is already going on too long, so I'll just go ahead with all the characters. Oh, and some actors are here just because I can and it would be funny to see Tom Hiddleston possibly sharing a dorm with Loki.**

* * *

A basic description of the houses that I am using as a guide:

The houses are presented with a locked door.  
Gryffindor: Kicks it down  
Slytherin: Picks the lock  
Ravenclaw: Finds the key  
Hufflepuff: Knocks

Avengers:

Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow  
Clint Barton/Hawkeye  
Thor/Thor  
Tony Stark/Iron Man  
Bruce Banner/The Hulk  
Steve Rogers/Captain America  
Jane  
Sam Wilson/The Falcon  
James (Bucky) Barnes/The Winter Soldier  
Peggy (Just 'cause)  
Nick Fury  
Phil Coulson  
LOKI/LOKI

Sherlock:  
Sherlock Holmes  
John Watson

The Lord of the Rings:  
Aragorn  
Legolas  
Gimli  
Frodo  
Merry  
Pippin  
Gandalf  
Sam  
Elrond  
Sauron  
Saruman

The Hobbit:  
Smaug (why not?)  
Bilbo  
Thorin Oakenshield  
Bard  
Thranduil

Star Wars:  
Anakin Skywalker  
Obi Wan Kenobi  
Padme Amidala  
Luke Skywalker  
Leia Skywalker  
Han Solo  
Chewbacca  
Count Dooku  
Emperor Palpatine

Harry Potter:  
Harry Potter  
Hermione Granger  
Ron Weasley  
Neville Longbottom  
Tom Riddle/Voldemort

Pokemon: (why not)  
Red  
Blue  
Green  
Giovanni  
Gold  
Silver  
Crystal  
Pryce  
Ruby  
Sapphire  
Emerald  
Archie  
Maxie  
Diamond  
Pearl  
Platinum  
Cyrus  
Black  
White  
N  
X  
Y  
Lysandre

Actors:  
Tom Hiddleston  
Benedict Cumberbach  
Martin Freeman  
Daniel Radcliffe  
Harrison Ford

I think that's it.


	2. 1: Sorting

**Yay first chapter! This will be mostly sorting, sorry. I'm just launching into the train ride because I don't want to get complicated. Also, I don't know much about Sherlock or any of the actors, so I can't guarantee personalities or anything. Basically, I'm writing Sherlock as a very unsocial person who gets bored a lot. Most of the actors are just enthusiastic people, and Martin Freeman just lets himself get dragged around by Benedict Cumberbatch, and then- well, I mustn't give it all away.**

* * *

"BROTHER! We must sit with the Avengers!" Thor said, dragging Loki to the Avengers' compartment.

"Oh, come on, I want to meet someone new," Loki complained.

"And besides, your compartment's full," Indeed it was. Loki yanked his arm out of Thor's grip and started walking down the train.

"Hey, you," Loki turned and saw two boys with red hair.

"Do you want to sit with us?" the one said, gesturing to a compartment where a couple other guys sat.

"Sure," Loki said, noticing the mischievous glint in the brothers' eyes.

"What are your names?" Loki asked.

"I'm Fred," the one said.

"And I'm George!" said the other.

"Loki," Loki said. They entered the compartment.

"So, everybody, this is Loki," Fred said. One just murmured "Hi" and the others said 'Hello," but one man simply jumped out of his seat to shake his hand.

"Hello, Loki, I'm Tom," he said, pretty quickly.

"Uh, hi," Loki said. This man was _way_ too enthusiastic for his liking.

"I'm Sauron," A guy with long black hair and red eyes said.

"My name's Silver," this kid had red hair.

"I'm Benedict, or just Ben, and this is Martin," another guy said, offering his hand. Loki shook it, to be polite. Martin looked interested, but also like he didn't really want to be there. From the corner, another kid with red hair and almost snake-like eyes spoke in a voice that sounded awfully like Benedict's.

"I'm _supposed_ to be a dragon, but this happened and- well, anyway, my name's Smaug," he said. That left the one pretending to be asleep who murmured "Hi" and the man next to him trying to convince him to get up. Loki sat down next to Silver and then the sleeping man yelled loudly.

"FOR GOODNESS SAKES, JOHN, I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!" he yelled, and the other man, John, his name must be, moved away from him slowly. The man who yelled turned over and when back to pretending to sleep.

"So, hello, I'm John," John said, pretending the whole thing never happened. Loki was about to respond when two more people knocked on the door. These two were about as tall as children and they had the same mischievous glint that Fred & George both had. Martin, who was closest to the door, opened it.

"Hello, I'm Merry!" the one said.

"And I'm Pippin! Everywhere else is full, do you mind?" the other said.

"No, no, not at all," Ben said. They sat down in between Sauron and Smaug. **(Okay, this isn't part of the story, but right now the compartment is organized as such: Right side starting from the door: Martin Freeman, Benedict Cumberbatch, Tom Hiddleston, Fred Weasley, George Weasley, John Watson, Sherlock Holmes. Left side starting from the door: Silver, Loki, Smaug, Merry, Pippin, Sauron. Just a little bit of interest.)** Now there were thirteen people sitting in this compartment.

"So, what house do you reckon we'll be in?" Fred asked.

"Well, Sherlock'll obviously be in Ravenclaw," John said.

"Shut up about me," the man who must be named Sherlock muttered.

"I think we'll mostly have Hufflepuffs and Slytherins," Loki said. This conversation went on for about fifteen minutes until they reached Hogwarts, and I won't bother writing down the whole of it. When everyone started to gather their things, John sighed and started poking Sherlock repeatedly. At about the fourteenth poke, Sherlock jumped up, yelling.

"JOHN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHY ARE YOU POKING ME? I DIDN'T GET A SECOND OF SLEEP OVER HERE-" Loki pulled out his wand. He could do magic without it, just it was required for Hogwarts.

" _Silencio_ ," Loki said, and Sherlock immediately became silent, but his mouth was still moving.

"I need to learn that spell," John said.

"Isn't that an O.W.L. level spell?" George asked.

"I don't know, I just learned it because I like silence," Loki said. They all grabbed their trunks and disembarked from the train. Loki heard a call of "Firs' years, firs' years o'er 'ere, firs' years," and a large swinging lantern. The thirteen all went over to a huge man in a furry coat.

"That's Hagrid," Fred said.

"The gamekeeper," George said. **(I'm just going to skip right to the sorting.)**

The students filed into the hall in a straight line.

"Hello, first years, I am Professor McGonagall," a witch in a green hat said. A scroll of paper appeared in her hand. Loki looked behind him, Sherlock was looking very bored and yawning loudly. **(I'm not going to bother with alphabetical order because there's so many characters)**.

"When I call your name, you will come up and try on the hat," Professor McGonagall gestured to a stool with a wrinkled old hat.

"Romanoff, Natasha," a girl with red hair came up to the hat. The hat was silent for a minute, then shouted " _SLYTHERIN!_ " The house clad in green robes clapped as she joined them.

"Barton, Clint," " _SLYTHERIN!_ "

"Odinson, Thor," " _GRYFFINDOR!_ "

"Stark, Tony," " _RAVENCLAW!_ "

"Banner, Bruce," " _RAVENCLAW!_ " Bruce and Tony high-fived at the table.

"Foster, Jane," " _RAVENCLAW!_ " Loki saw Thor look disappointed. Loki laughed inside his head. Anything that made Thor unhappy made him happy.

"Rogers, Steve," " _HUFFLEPUFF!_ " Steve looked happy meeting all his fellow Hufflepuffs.

"Wilson, Sam," " _GRYFFINDOR_ _!_ "

"Barnes, James," " _SLYTHERIN!_ "

"Carter, Peggy," " _HUFFLEPUFF!_ "

"Fury, Nick," " _SLYTHERIN!_ "

"Coulson, Phil," " _GRYFFINDOR!_ "

"Laufeyson, Loki," Loki went up to the stool and McGonagall set the hat on his head.

" _Hello, Loki,"_

 _"Why are you in my head?"_

 _"Just seeing where to put you. Oh, yes, you are most definitely..."_

 _"SLYTHERIN!"_ the hat shouted the last word for the whole hall to hear. Loki watched the rest of the sorting from the Slytherin table.

"Holmes, Sherlock," as soon as the hat went on Sherlock's head, the hat opened its mouth, but slowly closed it again.

 _"SLYTHERIN!"_ The hat yelled.

Loki saw John looked bewildered at the hat's selection as Sherlock took the seat next to him.

"I don't think I introduced myself. I am Loki-" Loki started.

"Yeah, I heard. I'm Sherlock. Now shut up and leave me alone," Sherlock said. Loki thought something might be wrong, but he didn't say anything more.

"Watson, John," The hat took a rather long time deciding for John. John said afterwards that the hat was decided between Hufflepuff, where he belonged, or Slytherin, where he wanted to be.

" _HUFFLEPUFF!"_ John looked disappointed as he joined Peggy and Steve at the Hufflepuff table.

"Aragorn, son of Arathorn," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Greenleaf, Legolas," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Gimli, son of Gloin," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Baggins, Frodo," _"HUFFLEPUFF!"_

"Brandybuck, Meriadoc," _"HUFFLEPUFF!"_

"Took, Peregrin," _"HUFFLEPUFF!"_

"the Grey, Gandalf," _"RAVENCLAW!"_

"Gamgee, Samwise," _"HUFFLEPUFF!"_

"Peredhel, Elrond," _"RAVENCLAW!"_

"Abhorred, Sauron," _"SLYTHERIN!"_

"the White, Saruman," _"RAVENCLAW!"_

"Smaug," _"SLYTHERIN!"_

"Baggins, Bilbo," _"HUFFLEPUFF!"_

"Oakenshield, Thorin," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"the Bowman, Bard," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Greenleaf, Thranduil," _"SLYTHERIN!"_

"Skywalker, Anakin," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Kenobi, Obi Wan," _"RAVENCLAW!"_

"Amidala, Padme," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Skywalker, Luke," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Skywalker, Leia," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Solo, Han," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_ _Wow, that's a lot of Gryffindors,_ Loki thought.

"Chewbacca," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Dooku, Jard," _"RAVENCLAW!"_

"Palpatine, Sheev," **(Yes, Sheev is Palpatine's first name)** _"SLYTHERIN!"_

"Potter, Harry," This took a bit longer, but eventually the hat yelled _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Granger, Hermione," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Weasley, Ron," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_ The two Weasley twins, Fred & George, were already sitting at the table, and Fred clapped Ron on the back as he sat down. _Ron. What a ridiculous name,_ Loki thought.

"Longbottom, Neville," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Riddle, Tom," The hat hadn't even touched his head when it shouted _"SLYTHERIN!"_.

"Red," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Blue," _"RAVENCLAW!"_

"Green," _"SLYTHERIN!"_ **(I'm going off the Pokemon Adventures manga, where Green stole a Squirtle)**

"Giovanni," _"RAVENCLAW!"_

"Gold," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Silver," _"SLYTHERIN!"_ **(Same again, Silver stole a Totodile)**

"Crystal," _"RAVENCLAW!"_

"Pryce," _"SLYTHERIN!"_

"Ruby," _"HUFFLEPUFF!"_

"Sapphire," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Emerald," _"RAVENCLAW!"_

"Archie," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Maxie," _"SLYTHERIN!"_

"Diamond," _"HUFFLEPUFF!"_

"Pearl," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Platinum," _"RAVENCLAW!"_

"Cyrus," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Black," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"White," _"HUFFLEPUFF!"_

"N," _"SLYTHERIN!"_

"X," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Y," _"RAVENCLAW!"_

"Lysandre," _"SLYTHERIN!"_

"Hiddleston, Tom," _"HUFFLEPUFF!"_

"Cumberbatch, Benedict," _"HUFFLEPUFF!"_

"Freeman, Martin," _"HUFFLEPUFF!"_

"Radcliffe, Daniel," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_

"Ford, Harrison," _"GRYFFINDOR!"_ and with that, McGonagall swept the hat from the stool and vanished the stool with a wave of her wand.


End file.
